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Rollmastr 3000 - Jamieson Cobleigh

About Rollmastr 3000

Previous Entry Rollmastr 3000 Jun. 30th, 2007 @ 03:40 pm Next Entry
At work, the toilet paper dispensers display the words Rollmastr 3000 on them. I can only wonder what was improved over the Rollmastr 2000 and what great advances will be made when they introduce the Rollmastr 4000.
Current Mood: sillysilly
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From:reveilles
Date:June 30th, 2007 07:44 pm (UTC)
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Did you notice? The stalls were made by a company called "HineyHiders".
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From:coffeebeanben
Date:June 30th, 2007 09:43 pm (UTC)
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Can I just say that you two are among the most well-matched couples ever?

The 3000 is for maximum sheet capacity. Seems to be built on increments of their 1500 sheet roll. Yes, I went and read the documentation. :)
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From:jd3000
Date:June 30th, 2007 09:56 pm (UTC)
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That's what they want, no, need you to think.

-JD
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From:reveilles
Date:July 3rd, 2007 12:15 am (UTC)
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A true engineer. :)
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From:jd3000
Date:June 30th, 2007 09:53 pm (UTC)
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The Rollmastr 2000 malfunctioned during testing and wiped out half of Pluto, which is the REAL reason it's been reduced to sub-planet status, they were just hoping no-one would notice the change in mass. The Rollmastr 1000 did not, in fact, malfunction, but independently constructed a collective of sentient toilet paper holders, governed by a number of over-processors located in highly-remote areas of Earth. These were later destroyed during a an extremely secret operation which claimed the lives of Amelia Earhart, Roald Admunsen, Percy Fawcett and Charles Nungesser. Rollmastr 3000 was prematurely stripped of its neural network during development in an attempt to rein in any potentially dangerous risks to the biosphere, but it was found doing so rendered the prototype only good for mass-production as consumer items.

Rollmastr 4000 has been rumored to, if built as designed, have the capability to open holes between parallel dimensions.

-JD
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From:dasubergeek
Date:July 2nd, 2007 01:09 am (UTC)
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Rollmaster 2000 had the Y2K bug, c'est tout.
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From:jd3000
Date:July 2nd, 2007 05:17 am (UTC)
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Exactly.

-JD
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